Made me smile

The first thing I saw when I woke up this afternoon was this text message;

“Im gonna be a daddy again :0)” ~ #1

If there was a man-friend in the world who is beyond priceless, I would have to say it’s him. He’s been there to listen to me cry and whine and gripe about just about everything from work to men to kids to just life in general. He’s pretty sensible when it comes to life-things, and even though he mostly just listens and don’t say much back, what little he does say makes sense and says a lot. (In other words, he has a way of making me feel better without making me feel like the moron-that-I-sometimes-am for feeling that way. Even though I’m sure he thinks exactly that most of those times.) I’m not sure what it was that connected me to him, but I never want to lose it. He’s one of those very rare real friends who even when I don’t see or talk to him much at times, I know he’s there if and when I need him. Besides that, he’s got an amazingly beautiful wife, and an adorable little girl who I can only imagine is going to keep her younger sibling right in line with how life rolls.

So, because he makes me smile, and because I’m so happy for him and his family, and because he is and always will be “#1″,

Congrats to the Big V family!!!!

Finding out who your friends aren’t . . .

. . . is a hard reality to face.

Over the past year, I’ve had more than a few of these hurtful instances and today was actually three of them.

If nothing else, this year has caused me to be more cautious with my heart, especially where people I care about are concerned. But also, I’m beginning to question my judgment of character, and the lack of character in people.

I am so curious as to why people are so careless with such fragile things as other people’s feelings, emotions, trust, and even friendship.

Are people to materialistic to realize the value in these things?

I’m a generally nice person and would do most anything for anyone. To some I’ve handed my heart on a silver platter, only to have them throw it on the floor. Why are people like that?

I don’t understand.

Thanks, I Needed That

Yes, I use my blog for venting, and yes dammit, people read it.

I knew that already…because I’ve had nearly 500 on this damn crazy shit I write about here,  and over 1,500 on my myspace “friends” blog…but most recently I know it because I’ve had so many ask about my down-and-out self.

I’ve tried my best to ‘be happy’ when I’m outside the walls of this ridiculous apartment I live in, but I guess I just wasn’t doing as good of a job at it as I thought I was…(thank-you-very-much-sweet-partner-of-mine for creatively pointing this out to me on a daily basis).

There is so much in my life that feels so wrong right now, and I’m doing my best to make all of it feel right again. Like a friend told me today “baby steps”. I’m taking baby steps. One foot in front of the other and every day I’m slowly making progress toward being that happy girl again.

Sometimes this depression crap causes me to feel that I have no one, when in reality, that’s so not true. For those who listen to my whiney self and/or follow my ridiculous blogs, thank you. For those who have to put up with me on a daily basis (especially recently), you deserve a gigantic trophy.

In spite of the fact that tonight was perhaps the craziest of all my nights at work, I am starting to feel a little better than I have recently; and I just didn’t feel like I could go on without saying that I so much appreciate the people in my life right now who have stuck by me and helped me get here. Whether you realize it or not, I know that you are the strength and encouragement that keeps me going forward.

Thank you.

Who Me?

. . . and then he sent this to my email this morning;

Hey stupid,                                                                                                                                   May I suggest following the advice of another wise woman. . .

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. ” ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Love you.

The Power of Honest Friends

From a discussion with a friend yesterday;

He: You know, you’re so easy to talk to. You don’t just listen to people, you hear.

Me: That’s because when I’m thinking about your issues, I don’t have to think about mine.

He: No I’m serious. Talking with you is so calming. You’re like a breath of fresh air through the window of an amazing soul.

Me: WTF??

He: You’ll learn.

Me: Learn WHAT?

He: To take a compliment.

Me thinking: {that was way to poetic for me}

He: And to take your own advice.

Me: Yea, ok. I doubt that.

He: You need to. And you need to start now. You’ve helped so many people through it, you need to start listening to it yourself.

Me: Whatever.

He: What!? Look around. You’re always helping other people. You don’t even realize it. It’s why people flock to you. They adore your positive energy and your outlook.

Me: M-hm.

He: You’re so stupid.

Me: EXCUSE ME!? WHY did you say that!?

He: To prove something to you….and I did….with just one word.

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